Life in Plastic

Yesterday I posted my Apple Store Rant, which pretty much set the tone for the rest of my day.  After visiting the Rotten Apple store I went to the Target, where I ran into my Mom and the Boy.  Who walked past me like they didn’t see me.  (The Boy didn’t see me because he was off in his own little world, but Mom did.)  I was on the phone and couldn’t say anything.  The shunning is now public and blatant.  Whatever, that isn’t what this is about.  But it does give you an idea of my mood….  to say it was black would be an understatement.

Anywhoo…

After Target I went to Kohl’s to return some pants.  I was standing in line at customer service waiting my turn and two people ahead of me was this….woman.  She was close to 6 feet tall in boots, probably weighed all of 100 lbs, had masses of bleached blonde hair and bodacious booblies, and was carrying a dog in a Louis Vuitton bag.  I kind of rolled my eyes at the outrageous sense of entitlement of people who think that “no animals except service animals allowed” rules don’t apply to them and their pwecious widdle purse dogs.

That always burns my ass – I almost went totally postal on a woman in Macy’s the other day with her dog on a leash.  Hello?  Rules people! (yes I ranted about rules yesterday but that was because I wasn’t told the rule!)

Anyway, blondie was standing in line when her cell phone rang.  And her musical ringtone started to play I’m a Barbie Girl…in a Barbie world...life in plastic…it’s fantastic…

I snorted.  Then I giggled.  And then I totally lost my shit and laughed hysterically right in her vacant little face.  Bent over, tears streaming down my face, loud hysterical guffaws.  That was the best thing I have seen/heard in a long, long time!

It was like a little present from the Universe: for lo I have given you much of the poo today but here – I give you a Barbie doll as a reward!